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feature :: bretro retro volume 2
Bretro Retro Volume 2
Welcome to Instalment Two of Bretro Retro, a monthly feature starring your favourite writer discussing all of your favourite old videogames.
You may be wondering why I’m standing in a shopping centre car park at 6AM on a Sunday morning rather than being at home in the Brett Doona And Pillow Fort getting ready for this edition of Bretro Retro.
Two words. Swap Meet.
Old people sell junk at Swap Meets. They sell it cheap and they have no idea that old consoles and games are priceless commodities and not junk. If you’re a canny shopper then Swap Meets are the place to get old consoles covered in dust that no one else wants for bargain prices. Try to imagine yourself as Robert Deniro in Taxi Driver, picking up the rubbish of society and driving it to other destinations whilst having a surly attitude.
Remember to dress like a hobo for Swap Meet. If you look like you’ve got no money then there’s a fair chance you’ll get stuff cheaper. If you can put off showering for a few days then all the better. Ugg Boots are sensible attire as are service station sunglasses. Try to swear a lot and pretend that you are not just unemployed but also unemployable. Some sellers will warm to you if you can convince them that you’ve been on workers compensation or the dole for the last four years.
Today I’m going to find something for us to look at for Bretro Retro Volume 2. Then I’m going to take it home and play it, then I’ll probably declare that it’s crap and sell it on Ebay with a stupid advertisement or description. It’s the circle of life. Somewhere in the middle of this circle I may place the item in a box for 2-3 years. Nothing screams hard core gamer like a box full of stuff that most people would consider to be rubbish.
Pirate Playstation One software is everywhere at Swap Meet. It’s like at sometime in the early 2000’s everyone went to Bali and brought home 320 PS1 discs with dodgy photocopied instructions and bad spelling. Pirate software is a crime people, robbing artists of their rightful royalties. You wouldn’t steal a car would you? You don’t want to be a terrorist or drug dealer do you? Don’t copy that floppy kids.
The real prize for any Bretro Retro fan out at the swap meet is eight bit console games. Prices vary from $20 each to a whole box for $4 depending on the seller. My swap meet visit today scored me Outrun 2019 for SEGA MegaDrive, in nice condition with instructions for $15 , although I also scored a Megadrive console to play it on as part of the deal as well.
With the shopping out of the way it’s time to start the review. Once again I connected my Megadrive to my VCR via an RF modulator switch and then into my 42 inch plasma so as to get the real 1990’s experience.
Outrun was among SEGA’s most important franchises both in the arcade and at home on their consoles. Outrun received a rather dodgy Master System port and a much better MegaDrive port for the home market. Outrun 2019 has a strange history and in many ways the Outrun title was just tacked on to an existing game in an effort to drive sales towards the end of the MegaDrive’s life.
Originally touted as a title for the Mega CD and called Cyber Road it was only late in development that it became part of the Outrun family and moved to the MegaDrive in the more familiar cartridge form, perhaps because of the poor Mega CD sales. Some beta ROMS of the game are also available in the usual places under the name Junkers High although it is doubtful if any physical CD’s exist.
After licking the cartridge a few times and blowing the dust out Outrun 2019 roared into life with some dire music. The original Outrun was renowned for having a fantastic soundtrack, a trait that 2019 does not share. Perhaps the music was stripped out when the move from CD to cartridge took place, perhaps the makers were just tone deaf. I’m leaning towards the latter.
Pressing start made the bad music stop and then more bad music began as the game started. Graphics were unremarkable and nothing like the awesome box picture. There was also no Ferrari and no blonde girl sitting next to me. Outrun 2019 was starting to stink like the hobo’s at the swap meet.
I pressed on for almost five minutes and then stopped. The game was horrible and the Megadrive I purchased had a bad burnt plastic smell. Then as if by the Will of SEGA the Megadrive stopped working. I had spent $15 on a rubbish game and broken Megadrive console.
I decided to put the Megadrive back into it’s box and then place it inside another box and then place it finally into a large box before placing it into my box like shed. The Swap Meet Hobo’s had won this round but I would be back again next Sunday morning, looking through peoples junk, buying it off them and then boxing it up because it was broken and never worked.
Two words. Swap Meet.
Old people sell junk at Swap Meets. They sell it cheap and they have no idea that old consoles and games are priceless commodities and not junk. If you’re a canny shopper then Swap Meets are the place to get old consoles covered in dust that no one else wants for bargain prices. Try to imagine yourself as Robert Deniro in Taxi Driver, picking up the rubbish of society and driving it to other destinations whilst having a surly attitude.
Remember to dress like a hobo for Swap Meet. If you look like you’ve got no money then there’s a fair chance you’ll get stuff cheaper. If you can put off showering for a few days then all the better. Ugg Boots are sensible attire as are service station sunglasses. Try to swear a lot and pretend that you are not just unemployed but also unemployable. Some sellers will warm to you if you can convince them that you’ve been on workers compensation or the dole for the last four years.
Today I’m going to find something for us to look at for Bretro Retro Volume 2. Then I’m going to take it home and play it, then I’ll probably declare that it’s crap and sell it on Ebay with a stupid advertisement or description. It’s the circle of life. Somewhere in the middle of this circle I may place the item in a box for 2-3 years. Nothing screams hard core gamer like a box full of stuff that most people would consider to be rubbish.
Pirate Playstation One software is everywhere at Swap Meet. It’s like at sometime in the early 2000’s everyone went to Bali and brought home 320 PS1 discs with dodgy photocopied instructions and bad spelling. Pirate software is a crime people, robbing artists of their rightful royalties. You wouldn’t steal a car would you? You don’t want to be a terrorist or drug dealer do you? Don’t copy that floppy kids.
The real prize for any Bretro Retro fan out at the swap meet is eight bit console games. Prices vary from $20 each to a whole box for $4 depending on the seller. My swap meet visit today scored me Outrun 2019 for SEGA MegaDrive, in nice condition with instructions for $15 , although I also scored a Megadrive console to play it on as part of the deal as well.
With the shopping out of the way it’s time to start the review. Once again I connected my Megadrive to my VCR via an RF modulator switch and then into my 42 inch plasma so as to get the real 1990’s experience.
Outrun was among SEGA’s most important franchises both in the arcade and at home on their consoles. Outrun received a rather dodgy Master System port and a much better MegaDrive port for the home market. Outrun 2019 has a strange history and in many ways the Outrun title was just tacked on to an existing game in an effort to drive sales towards the end of the MegaDrive’s life.
Originally touted as a title for the Mega CD and called Cyber Road it was only late in development that it became part of the Outrun family and moved to the MegaDrive in the more familiar cartridge form, perhaps because of the poor Mega CD sales. Some beta ROMS of the game are also available in the usual places under the name Junkers High although it is doubtful if any physical CD’s exist.
After licking the cartridge a few times and blowing the dust out Outrun 2019 roared into life with some dire music. The original Outrun was renowned for having a fantastic soundtrack, a trait that 2019 does not share. Perhaps the music was stripped out when the move from CD to cartridge took place, perhaps the makers were just tone deaf. I’m leaning towards the latter.
Pressing start made the bad music stop and then more bad music began as the game started. Graphics were unremarkable and nothing like the awesome box picture. There was also no Ferrari and no blonde girl sitting next to me. Outrun 2019 was starting to stink like the hobo’s at the swap meet.
I pressed on for almost five minutes and then stopped. The game was horrible and the Megadrive I purchased had a bad burnt plastic smell. Then as if by the Will of SEGA the Megadrive stopped working. I had spent $15 on a rubbish game and broken Megadrive console.
I decided to put the Megadrive back into it’s box and then place it inside another box and then place it finally into a large box before placing it into my box like shed. The Swap Meet Hobo’s had won this round but I would be back again next Sunday morning, looking through peoples junk, buying it off them and then boxing it up because it was broken and never worked.