No One Ever Told Him That He Was Not A King

News from Brett - Wednesday, 24 February 2010 @ 2:33am

I’ve been lucky enough to spend some time playing the demo of “Sonic and Sega All Stars Racing” and have come to the balanced conclusion that the game is a piece of shit. This creates quite a quandary for me, as I would like to continue having a pleasant relationship with SEGA as I like receiving review code for free but don’t wish to compromise my independent and factual opinions.

With this in mind, I have decided to fix “Sonic and Sega All Stars Racing” pro bono publico for SEGA in the hope that they will destroy all current versions of the game and replace them with my vision. It's a Win/Win/Win situation for myself, SEGA and Mr Syles.

Original Version Of Unoriginal Game

Here’s the original version that makes me want to cover my face in a white paste mask and murder the developers by throwing them out of the window of their office building.

Fixed Version - Only Available On SEGA Saturn

And here is the fixed version that I have created using a powerful development tool called MSPAINT. You can see that I have covered up all the shit characters and replaced them with the car from SEGA Rally. In addition to this change, in the final game all the tracks will be replaced with tracks from SEGA Rally II, and all the characters except the rally cars from SEGA Rally will be deleted from the final code.

Now if everyone can please excuse me, I have a masquerade ball to get ready for...