Grand Theft Auto Vice City Stories

Review from Matt and Matt - Wednesday, 27 June 2007 @ 2:12pm

A little while ago an old friend of mine came to visit and stay with me for a few days. We used to be close, so I was really looking forward to seeing him. The strange thing was that I really didn't realize just how much time had passed until I saw him again. He looked really old and tired. It didn't take all that long to get over that, though, and remember why he was such a great mate in the first place. We had an absolute blast. I'd forgotten just how much fun he could be, and I was sad to see him go.

That friend was Grand Theft Auto.

We'd been close from the beginning, me and Grand Theft Auto III were tight. We'd steal cars and hurtle down the street together. We liked stealing the Banshee from the car dealership. Sometimes we'd cruise down the street until we saw a woman walking alone, then we'd punch her once so she ran into somewhere quiet like a construction site or parkland, and chase her down and kill her. That was always fun. Years later we would ride together, stolen PGR600s whipping down the freeway while Spandau Ballet blared on a radio that shouldn't technically be there. We'd do drivebys on cops and see if we could get away.

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There were hard time, sure. I had GTA's back through a lot of battles. A lot of uptight people didn't like his hardcore street smart styling or his violent ways. So we punched them.

On a more personal level I supported him when his marriage to Sony got a bit rocky and he started seeing other consoles. Because that's what you do with a mate. I even told him how good he looked with… fingers.

But something went a bit wrong. We kind of grew apart. If anything I think maybe I grew up and GTA didn't. I know, it's hard to say about a friend, but it's true.

It wasn't a racial thing, we we're far too close for that sort of crap. But there was a definite distance there. I mean… when that whole Hot Coffee affair broke I was still there to support him. What consenting adults want to do in their own home is entirely up to them. But the love was gone, you know? And sometimes loyalty isn't enough.

Like I said, we grew apart, I guess I needed a bit more out of life, not just the same old thing, over and over. It had been, what? 6 years? And it was all getting a bit samish. To be honest, I don't think he really missed me. It seemed like he'd been more popular than ever during that time.

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Still, he was coming round to visit again. I have to admit I was a little shocked by how old he's looking, I have to admit. The years have not been kind, and it's been a long time since we first met. A very long time.

And it WAS good. I don't think I can say clearly enough how much fun it was. Stealing motorbikes and honing down the freeway into oncoming traffic. We went and had a look at how much things had changed in the old stomping ground. The future site of the Mall where we would do so much damage. We'd get a armed up and slaughter the place clean, then snipe-kill the cops that came, till our wanted level dinged through the roof and then try to make a break for it outside. We never got away with it, but man how we laughed when the choppers came down.

It was just like the old days. We killed only women wearing a particular pair of pants. We beat up men for their guns. We started a crime syndicate dealing exclusively in prostitution, and took out all competing brothels. Sure, we didn't have to kill all the girls, but... you know. They were there.

Standing on the roof of a building with a grenade in my hand I remembered just how much fun this had been. I had blocked a major intersection with a single well placed car, and there was traffic backed up for ages, beeping and complaining. It was a particularly good grenade throw, I have to admit. I landed the grenade right next to my stopped car, and the chain reaction of burning cars and explosions tore through the night.

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I'd kind of forgotten the mayhem we could cause. I'd forgotten the radio stations, the thrill of the chase, the carnage and the silliness.

GTA, my friend, you have so much to offer still, a lot of fun, a lot of thrills. But it's time to grow up. Let's not beat around the bush, it's time to get a face lift. You're looking kind of raggedy these days. But that's OK because you're still my man.

Summary

The GTA series (from 3 on) have always been exceptional. If you played through Vice City you might think there's nothing much on offer here. You'd be wrong. It's like a trip down memory lane. Setting it just BEFORE VC makes a lot of sense, and adds a nice touch. Fact is... GTA:VCS is a lot of fun with an old old friend.

Pros

Really good fun, some surprisingly likeable characters, good voice acting, though not as "famous" as GTA:VC, etc got. Familiar territory means no need to learn the roads, etc. The radio stations. God how I love them. Is still GTA.

Cons

Same thing you've already played before. Half a dozen times. This ain't next-gen. Some really insanely unlikeable characters. Repeating missions, sometimes repeatedly, sucks. Is still GTA.