FIFA 09

Review from Samo, Samo, Samo, Samo, Samo, Samo and Samo - Tuesday, 18 November 2008 @ 2:25am

Here we go again. Another year, another Christmas buying period, another big belch of half-arsed, half-developed, half-photocopied, half-witted games from the Evil, Axis of. ...ahem

Last year I had a big rant about how FIFA 08 was exactly the same as FIFA 07 which was pretty much the same as FIFA 06. So my expectations for FIFA 09 were lukewarm at best and guess what? FIFA 09 would make its daddies proud; it’s a shameless chip off the old block once again.

And I’m spent.

Go Long!

Not quite. There is something about FIFA 09. Something endears it towards me somewhat more than its predecessors.

It’s not the presentation or the menu system. In fact that’s what annoys me the most. It is EXACTLY and I really mean EXACTLY the same as FIFA 08. Maybe there are a couple of very minor layout changes but that’s not a change! That’s an EXCUSE! A poor one at that! Look at it this way, there is a new feature called Adidas Live Season (gratuitous product placement, much?) which supposedly downloads real world form for the players. It’s so insignificant and blends into the old menu system so well EA had to put a big orange ‘NEW!’ tag on it to show you what’s different. They might as well have placed a big sign on it that says “We’ve been too busy spinning around on our office chairs to change the menu system so this is the bit that’s different you blind pillock.”

Wait a second, this isn't soccer! It's Dance Dance Revolution!

It’s definitely NOT EA Trax, which is less annoying than before and is actually starting to add a couple of decent tracks (note correct spelling EA) and the artist list includes bands like The Kooks, The Ting Tings, Kasabian, MGMT, Sam Sparro, The Script and The Fratellis. The rest is the usual padding of the playlist with easy to associate with soccer yet cheap to license Latin music which isn’t too bad; however, serious points are deducted for The Veronicas.

It’s not the commentary, which is supplied once again by series mainstays Martin Tyler and Andy Gray and frankly, it’s excellent. Still, what I said last year about the sameness of it stands this year as well and I’m absolutely certain I heard a few sound bites that I heard a year ago too.

Graphics wise, it’s a touch crisper. Maybe the textures are a fraction higher res and the framerate has been increased a bit. That’d be it though; it’s definitely not a dramatic step forward from its two closest predecessors. Still, there’s no doubting that FIFA 09 is a good looking game but it’s not that either.

I'm sure that if I purse my lips a bit I'll look like more of a douchebag than I already do!

What it is, is feel. The gameplay is much the same as before, but it’s been ever so slightly tweaked. Crosses in the forward area are much, much harder to nail now but keeping possession of the ball is fractionally easier. You’re not dispossessed every time an opposition player sneezes in the near vicinity. As a result the game flows better, there are less controller throwing tanties and there’s so much less frustration. Sure the old problems with clunky player switching and delayed control are still evident but because of this newfound flow, it’s less glaring. It is a nicer game to play than FIFA 08 and FIFA 07, however you have to sit back and think whether such a minor improvement is worth a hundred of your hard earned. In short, the verdict is the same as last year. If you’ve played 07 or 08, the answer is no. If you haven’t, then you’ll be happy with 09.

PROTECT THE BALLS

So this is Christmas buying time. There are plenty of Mums and Dads out there who’ll be looking at FIFA 09 as a nice, G rated safe bet for Christmas tree fodder and as a result it’s going to sell by the truckload while imaginative, innovative and brilliant titles like de Blob sit on the shelves begging. Need I remind you of Psychonauts? It’s a crying shame really because EA still has no motivation to make a truly new football game. They make a fortune off reskinning the old one every year and why spend more money on development than you have to?

Pros

Newfound flow makes FIFA 09 less frustrating and more playable than 08 and 07.

Cons

Still the same thing rehashed without innovation, imagination or shame.